In which I talk about stuff

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Last Father’s Day

This is written for my dad, who passed away at 51, two years ago today.

Last Father’s Day

They used to be big, strong hands,

worker’s hands.

Now they’re wasted, bony and skinny.

Hairy, gnarled knuckles,

with freckles all over,

Wide, flat nails stained by nicotine.

The skin yellows as his body fails.

They shake as he rolls a cigarette,

perhaps the last one.

In his smoky living room that now

smells of medicine and sickness.

Liquid morphine is sticky on the table top.

“Dad, why did it have to be so quick?”

“It’s not that quick.

Packet fags are faster, I guess,

but I prefer roll-ups.”


TIFOoPiaS Part 1, Items 1-9

Welcome to Things I Found Out of Place in a Supermarket!

So, after some searching, I found my first photo that I thought lost! This was taken in Lidl, Yoker (that’s in Glasgow), the picture is of an empty Pepsi Max can sitting on top of a stack of paper towels. I think this is actually a case of ‘rubbish left on an unrelated shelf’. This is mainly because the item arrangement in a Lidl is so haphazard, it’s difficult to determine whether an item has been left on the wrong shelf or if it’s just a victim of their poor shelf layout.

Now we move to Sainsbury; they’ve opened a new mini-Sainsbury in Glasgow city centre, and it provided a couple of photo opportunities. We’ve got sushi on top of Bernard Matthew’s turkey breast:

Next, a bottle of salad cream next to, surprisingly, some salad. It’s not often that the misplaced items have anything to do with their unsuspecting new neighbours.

And now to a Tesco Metro in Glasgow city centre. Plenty to be found here. For example, these toy cars from the film Cars seem to be getting everywhere, even onto the biscuit shelf! I’m pretty sure there should be Digestives there.

Here’s his pal, and he’s kidnapped a helpless lettuce and gone to hide out in the bread section!

Somebody’s put some WeightWatchers bread down next to packs and packs of chocolate. They’re either really quite mean, or they’ve just fallen off the wagon.

I give a pass to the reduced shelf, as it usually has a whole mess of different products sharing space, but this reduced pack of ham is sitting among clearly-not-reduced dog food tins.

I also found a pack of shortbread fingers next to the Dairylea Dunkers. I can see the logic here. Finger-shaped food, I get it. Dunking shortbread is just asking for a crumb-filled cup of tea, though.

And finally (for today, still got 91 to go!), a bag of Rowntrees ‘Very Berry Jellies’ sweets, sitting happily in the bananas. Yes, they taste like fruit. No, they are not one of your five-a-day.

And there you have it, my first nine items Found Out of Place in a Supermarket! Many more to come 🙂

Gunpowder, Treason and Plot – Or, Fireworks, Mittens and Hot Chocolate

These fireworks were all photoed at a local fi...

Image via Wikipedia

This is the first time I’ve been able to see so many fireworks from my home. I remember being about ten or eleven years old, and being stuck in the house with an ear infection while Fireworks Night went on without me – another Saturday as it happens, because I remember that Noel’s House Party was on the television 🙂 I could only see a few fireworks from my bedroom window, and I could hear a few of them, but then I was living in a fairly small town where one of the only firework displays was the one put on by the local firefighters.

When I was a teenager, we lived near a big hill that people would flock to on November 5th to try and see the whole town’s firework displays going off. We tried to get there once or twice, but it was always packed and we could never see anything.

Now I’m living in my own flat, at the top of a hill overlooking most of Glasgow, and it’s incredible. The city council’s firework display hasn’t even started yet, but the whole town is alight with sparkles and bursts of fire. It almost sounds like the town is under fire, says my brother. I can see where he’s coming from, with the high pitched whistles followed by loud bangs, but the difference is in the crackling, fizzing noises and beautiful, multicoloured sprays of light.

The best firework display I ever saw was set to music: I specifically remember an instrumental version of Enrique Inglesias’s Glorious, and the 1812 Overture, which works really well with fireworks.

I can’t wait until the big display starts, it’s going to be epic.